Unrapt gifts

I'll admit from the start that this is not my favorite time of year. Back in the days of listservs, I had a filter set to automatically delete any email that contained the phrase "Twas the night before," because there was never anything entertaining in the satiric doggerel that followed.

And I wish Facebook would figure out something similar.

Even the stuff that wasn't parody was pretty awful, he said, posting a parody of a beloved holiday classic.

And while I never had things put quite as plainly as in today's Reply All, yes, that is the only possible motivation for sitting through 99 percent of holiday programming.

Keep looking, Drew. I found a GF who liked to cuddle through "Plan 9 From Outer Space" and "The Conqueror."

She would think of this as foreplay:

 

("Titanic"? Was some copywriter being a wiseguy?)

 

Other voices, other tombs

For someone who is not an editorial cartoonist, Dan Piraro sure knows how to place a barb.

Not that the editorial cartoonists gave Carson a pass. Carson has the same deep understanding of ancient Egypt that Howard Hughes had for the Mongol Empire, which is to say, he's so far off target as to be amusing rather than simply appalling, and he was an irresistable target for the editorialists.

But there's something more gob-smacking in unexpectedly tripping over him in Bizarro. The laugh is bigger when you're not braced for it, and this is way more specific and pointed than Piraro's usual more broad-based social commentary.

The single-panel format also keeps it stronger for being necessarily pithy and underplayed.

 

Juxtaposition of the Day

(Deflocked)

(Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Go read the rest, we'll wait)

I'm all in favor of people making a living at doing the thing they do to make a living.

But, boy oh boy, is it a work in progress.

I really like Patreon and would strongly encourage you to support your favorite cartoonists who have a Patreon set up. And if you browse through that latter link, you'll find creators whose level of support will surprise you, one way or the other, as well as a whole lot whose level of support is equal to the level of which you'd heard of them in the first place.

Let me repeat a phrase: "Support your favorite cartoonists."

I'd love to be able to afford to support every cartoonist whose work I enjoy, but I have to set a limit. And it's not just Patreon: I saw a rant yesterday by someone along the lines of "I supported your Kickstarters, you bastards ..."

It can't work that way, or we just end up passing the same dollar bill around in a circle and nobody gets to spend it on food or shelter.

I think most cartoonists understand this, or, at least, I thought so until I went through that Patreon link and saw how many apparently throw up a Patreon and hope the 14 people who visit their site each month will kick in $100 or so a week each.

If your hits are not in five figures, your support won't be in three.

But the newspaper people, who are supposed to understand these things, don't understand these things either, when it comes to setting up paywalls. They want you to pay for on-line access about the same amount you would have if the printed copy were dropped on your doorstep each morning.

Leaving aside the fact that the paper carrier was getting about 30% of the take, and that paper and ink are not free either, there's another problem with this model: People don't subscribe to the paper for one feature.

So if my only interest in your paper is to follow your editorial cartoonist, don't expect me to pony up $99 a year for the privilege. Maybe let me create a prepaid account, charge me by the click and then cut me off when I need a refill. 

And while we're on the topic, here's something else: Don't be throwing up those gray translucent screens unless there's a rea$on.

I understand if you've got a client who will give you a penny every time I click through instead of searching for the little X to turn that crap off so I can read what I came to read, but if it's just you pestering me to make a commitment, I'm gonna stop coming by.

I'd rather go over to Reply All and watch crappy movies with Lizzie.

 

Ah, honey, you know I'm just kiddin' 

 

Comments

[Brian Fies]

I've never paid much mind to Patreon (though I like the idea) and a browse through the "Cartoonists" index was bracing. The proportion earning what I'd consider "enough to make it worth the effort" is 2% or 3%; 9 out of 10 earn less than $20/month (that's my impression, I didn't really do the math). Some very good cartoonists I've actually heard of are pulling in peanuts.

Not sure What It All Means or what we're supposed to do about it, but it's interesting data for those of us trying to pick our way through the New Creative Economy.