Asleep at the calendar

I've now seen 61 New Years and, if I were a month older, this would have been #62.

The thrill is gone. Both because they really do speed up -- 1/60th goes by pretty fast -- and because, as Derf notes, 2012 was nothing to build a monument to. 

On the other hand, Derf himself had a pretty damn good year with the release of his memoir, "My Friend Dahmer," an extraordinary book that was reviewed here and everywhere else and was just named the best graphic non-fiction work over at the Onion, on its non-kidding pages. It made several other "best of" lists, too.

Which goes to show you that the fact that the world is spinning down the drain doesn't mean you have to go with it. This is a more comforting notion than the equally true but converse principle that, no matter how great the year at large is, you still have to dig in and create your own successes.

Bottom line: You can't slag off all your problems on the state of the planet. And I say that as someone who spent the better part of a decade building up a successful international platform for a second income based on a medium that all but crashed and burned just as I was putting on the last coat of paint and preparing to hang out the sign.

I don't go to New Year's parties anymore. I sure don't have any interest in attending pity parties.

As for resolutions, go ahead. Knock yourself out. 

But change comes when you finally truly want it, and it's like quitting drinking or smoking or anything else. You can't decide you want it because of a calendar.

Unless that's the extra nudge you need, which is better than the extra nudge of losing your job or having your lover walk out. If New Year's Resolutions work for you, you should definitely make them. 

If, on the other hand, you decide along about April that you should get in shape, I don't think you should put it off for eight months just to coordinate with the calendar, y'know? Just drop and give us 20.

As for me, I'm embracing the pragmatic view of Agnes and Trout, who don't mistake the holiday for some magical interlude during which the rules of real life do not apply:

I know that, a day from now, the two of them will be off on some new, odd, overly optimistic, totally impractical project. And that maybe Agnes will grow up to be a female Ralph Kramden, but I don't think so, and I know that Trout won't, because, once she finds the thing that's going to get her out of here, she will bestride it and head for that exit without looking back.

In any case, it won't happen by them wishing for it on New Year's, and I think they have an advantage in knowing that.

As for me, I'm down 12 pounds since October, which I attribute to the fact that I started in October instead of waiting until today. Not only am I already 12 pounds farther along, but, if I'd decided back then to make it a New Year's Resolution, I'd have had three months to talk myself out of doing it at all and then it wouldn't have happened.

I said at top of the post that I've seen 61 New Years and let me make it plain that I didn't see them all from the very start. My parents didn't give me permission to stay up for the first nine or 10, and I've given myself permission not to stay up for the last several.

Know what? They seem to happen whether you're watching or not.

Though I would note that, with the right attitude, you can even celebrate the fact that the thrill is gone.

 

Comments

[Nostalgic]

This was the first year i neither went out nor turned on the TV. Before, i always wanted to at least connect with the ball drop, like plugging in to the world event. We stayed awake reading, only because the kids always phone and being awakened by a phone is worse than fighting the fatigue. Calendars, phooey. But looking forward to another year of CSotD. Happy '13!

[Mat]

This is late and may not be seen, but whenever I discuss with people about making substantive changes to my lifestyle, whether to eat better work out, etc., I always state that if I want to make the change it will always be in the near future. Today, tomorrow or this upcoming weekend (depending on the activity). This past year, I've made several changes to my lifestyle to make myself healthier and get back into shape. In all situations, I decided to start changes immediately. Immediately cut out most red meat. Immediately start working out. Immediately stop lazing on the couch, etc.

Otherwise, said changes don't happen.

[Mike Peterson]

The only time I planned a reform was when I quit smoking. Knowing we were a couple of months away from driving cross-country (Colo to NY) to visit my non-smoking parents for two weeks, I immediately quit smoking in the car. In fact, I began limiting myself to only smoking on the back porch, in order to cut down the psychological triggers.

By the time we made the trip, I had completely broken myself of smoking in the car, so the drive out wasn't difficult, and, with no familiar surroundings and no other smokers present, the two weeks passed easily.

When we returned, I was detoxed and I simply stayed off the back porch. What I hadn't foreseen was that I used to sit out there to read the morning paper and also for proof-reading. But those two were easier to handle by shifting them to the kitchen table.

Having gone right-now-cold-turkey a half dozen other times, this was a better idea and it worked. But it was a special case.

If you want something done, don't plan. Do.